The night before . . .

So I'm sitting here trying to get everything sorted out for website, ads, download info, etc etc for the release of my very first single...Guns and Glitter- available now on on all major digital sites ... aaaahhhhh!!! lol sounds like a commercial right!

As I do all of this I realize how many emotions go with this...its super scary, its exciting, its challenging, its very fun, its complicated, its confusing, its rewarding, its a lot! I don't think I realized how many emotions would go with it. Everyone I know knew the songs existed because they knew I was working on it and went to Nashville, but only a few had actually heard the songs. I had no way of knowing what people will think or say or do. Will they buy it? Will they tell their friends to buy it? Will they sing along? Will they get it? Will they like it? So much on they, they, they ...then I remind myself my thinking behind it all in the beginning...

God gives us talent and he created art. Art is an interpretation of what we see and hear in our heads and everyone doesn't see and hear the same things. Everyone doesn't like the same things. {This is still not the blog post for the back story on how all of this came to be but I promise it will come one of these days} ... But in the midst of a lot of "do this or not do this confusion" I remember having to confidently come to the place that "This is what I hear in my head. This is my vision. These are my songs. If I'm the only one that likes it- I want to hear it finished. I'm doing the work. I'm making the effort. I'm putting up the cash I don't have but will figure out how to get, I want to see it through or when I'm 80 I'll still wonder what they could've sounded like." So I did.

The musicians I had in Nashville captured what I heard and the co-writers that I worked with helped to polish the vision I had. I could have just said "thanks guys!" and kept it all, but I want to share it in case there are other people who do like it and want to hear it. Side note- Have you ever thought about what amazing talent is roaming around homeless or a brilliant computer genius working at a drive thru? It makes me sad to think of things that God put inside of people that the world may never see or hear...anyways....

How ironic is it though that the second line of Guns and Glitter is "I don't care what you think" HA yeah right! People say that all day long but deep down they really do.... except in this instance when I wrote that line thats exactly what I was saying - "This is me and I'm ok with that. I. have. to. be. ok. with. that. So "I don't care what you think" was that reminder ... even if I do still have to remind myself of that sometimes...even tonight .... but doesn't everybody have to do that sometimes?!

Then I got the first text of "I heard your song and love it" and I'm like what how?! iTunes posted it early and there it is. Flood of emotions and it almost made me cry. There it is, up and out there. Heres where I tell myself if they love it or if they hate it I finished it and have no regrets.